Dinner/Breakfast

My neighbors feed me all the time.  Last night I decided to feed them.  I made clam chowder.  Not potato chowder with an invisible piece of clam.  CLAM chowder.  With cream.  Then I cleaned a dozen giant prawns….I dunno…about two pounds.

I brought the chowder to a simmer and dropped in the prawns for about a minute until they ALMOST turned pink.  Then I pulled them out.

I twice- baked potatoes with butter.  When they were almost done I stuffed them with brie cheese.  At that point I put in some large mushroom crowns stuffed (actually poured) full of butter, half-and half and brie cheese.  When that was almost done (the cheese gets lightly browned), I wrapped the prawns in dough and baked them into butter croissants.

The potatoes were finished with sour cream and chives.  The presentation was on plates with fresh garden lettuce leaves with beautiful miniature tomato eighths and a spoon of marinated artichoke hearts.  The tomato eighths were each drizzled with two drops of the artichoke marinade.

The surprise was seeing no main course and biting into a croissant to find a NOT OVERCOOKED prawn.

People who overcook food ought to be bitch-slapped.  Especially fish, alligator, frog, lamb, beef, horse, snake, goat, whatnot.   I don't mean those things need to be bitch-slapped.  I mean they shouldn't be overcooked. People don't want to eat raw pork or fowl, but if you overcook them they'll turn into shoe leather.  (full disclosure:  I cook bacon pretty thoroughly – and apple snails from the yard – and I try to cook wild birds, but you do what you gotta do – except with sails which will kill ya if you don't spend a week preparing them after you catch 'em..)

I like light wine with fish.  I served a 2008 Beringer vin rose.  No complaints and no left-overs.

This morning I decided to use the left-over ingredients for breakfast.  Shirred eggs with sweet, buttered multigrain rolls, lightly toasted.

Lightly coat a bowl with butter.  Lay in a couple of fresh, thinly sliced ham slices.  Pour in two fresh eggs, whole., one bowl per person. Put the bowls in a baking pan and bake at 375 for about eight minutes or until the egg yolks just start to turn white, but aren't cooked.  Remove from the oven, drizzle with two tablespoons of heavy cream or half-and-half, LIGHTLY salt and pepper, lay on thinly sliced or grated cheese (brie is soft and doesn't grate) and chives.  Put the buttered bread in now and bake for another 8 minutes or so – you want the cheese melted, but you want the egg yolks just runny.  It'll all come out at hot the same time.

Serve with 100% Kona coffee and, if you feel froggy, some homemade pepper jelly.  Again, no leftovers.

Someday I'll tell you how to make squid so tender that you don't need a knife to cut it.  Snail (escargot) prep and recipes on request!

Naturally, nothing I prepare has any calories whatsoever. Here's my secret. I bought a magic crystal from this hippie chick named Elaine Nelson.  I wave it over the food with a secret incantation.

“Ala Kazam! Ali Kadoodle! All fat stay gone from dis here foodle!  Hocus Pocus, autofocus!  No mo calories at this locus!”     (Shhhh!  Don't tell anyone!)

Most of my recipes come from here:  http://www.gutenberg.org/files/1080/1080-h/1080-h.htm

90% of success is showing up.  Getting the math right is the other 50%.

-T
Aut viam inveniam aut  faciamaut viam inveniam aut faciam.
-Hannibal


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